© Kat Morgan 1999/2000

In Name Only

Chapter 2: Believing what you're seeing

TheDster: So are you going to say anything?

KitKat: I don't know WHAT to say! Why didn't you tell me!

TheDster: LOL. I did! Hundreds of times.

Kat could actually see him laugh as he typed it. He really was LOL'ing. Oh my gods!

KitKat: How was I supposed to know? Do you have any idea how many posers there are out there? Geez, D! You could have warned me.

He looked directly into the camera and winked.

TheDster: That'll teach you not to believe me.

KitKat: Oh shut up!


Kat missed their next chat date. Her mind was in turmoil. I mean it was bad enough to goof around, saying that you wanted to meet a Backstreet Boy. Or even to chat with someone who claimed to be one. But to ACTUALLY be chatting to one! She felt confused. Even a little betrayed, though he hadn't lied to her. It was the fact that she had shared so much of herself with him. Not him, Howie D, but him Dster, the guy she had chatted with and trusted. She didn't know how to reconcile the two people.

When she finally logged on he was waiting for her.

TheDster: Where have you been? I was worried.

KitKat: I needed to think.

TheDster: The webcam is on. Are you watching?

KitKat: No

TheDster: Why not?

KitKat: Look this is hard for me.

TheDster: LOL. Why do I feel like I am about to get dumped.

"Because that IS what I am about to do," she thought.

TheDster: Am I, aren't I?

KitKat: Yes.

TheDster: Come on, Kat. Don't do that. We've been talking forever. You know the real me. Don't chuck me away, please.

KitKat: This just makes me feel so uncomfortable. Gods, you saw what I wrote to Mad! Shit!

TheDster: It was funny. I almost wish I could introduce her to AJ.

KitKat: See! You can do that! Us fans need privacy too, you know.

TheDster: That 'anonymity of the web' stuff you are always on about.

KitKat: Yes, dammit. Howie I can't do this.

TheDster: You called me Howie! First time!

KitKat: What the hell should I call you? Annoying jerk who led me on?

TheDster: Oh oh. You are pissed off.

KitKat: DUH!

TheDster: Please don't be. I realize it is a shock. I tried to lighten the blow, but you never believed me anyway so what was I supposed to do?

KitKat: You could have warned me!

The Dster: How?

KitKat: I don't know!

TheDster: Kat, turn on the webcam site. Please.

She sighed, and complied. He was sitting there with a rose in his hand, offering it to her. He really was so beautiful.

KitKat: That for me?

TheDster: Who else?

KitKat: Sigh. Okay. So I can't stay angry with you.

The Dster: Good.

KitKat: So how are you going to get that rose to me? LOL

TheDster: Augh! The curses of online communications!

He was laughing as he typed and she couldn't help but smile. She glanced at the background. His computer was in his bedroom. The colours behind him were muted. But she could see a bedside table, with family pictures and an alarm clock on it. Good gods! She was looking at the bed he slept in.

TheDster: You still there?

KitKat. Yeah. Sorry. Distracted.

TheDster: So, wanna watch a movie?

KitKat: LOL. On this little screen? Get real. I can barely see you…

He primped for a second, looking directly into the camera.

KitKat: LOL. You are SO vain!

TheDster: Are not! Okay, so a little….

KitKat: So that stuff about you taking forever in the bathroom are true?

TheDster: Which one of my bros ratted me out?

KitKat: LOL. You did. I saw it on a MuchMusic interview. Something about making sure hair 32 and 34 are in place.

TheDster; I remember that interview. LOL. How do you remember this stuff?

KitKat: I'm the fan, remember?

TheDster: Nope, you're the friend.

KitKat: Thanks.

TheDster: And I want to see you too! Get a webcam!

KitKat: LOL. I'll try. I have an article that I am just finishing (would be finished if some silly pop star would stop harassing me.) I may have some extra $$ after that invoice gets paid.

TheDster: I could send you one.

KitKat: NO!

He looked concerned on the screen as he read her response. He frowned deeply.

TheDster: Why?

KitKat: You be who you are and I will be how I am. And I am not a person who borrows stuff from rich buddies. I'll get my own damn camera.

TheDster: I wasn't trying to imply anything.

KitKat: Let's drop it, okay? I'll get a cam when I can.

TheDster: Fine.

It didn't take her long. She was leery of revealing herself to him, though she had described herself in detail several times. The camera was connected and all she had to do was turn it on. She sighed. What am I waiting for?

KitKat: You there?

TheDster: Waiting with bated breath

KitKat: Ha ha. Okay, here goes.

She flipped the switch and watched his face slowly. He looked intently at the screen, doing a quick little jerk as the picture finally loaded. He grinned widely.

TheDster: You're beautiful

KitKat: Shut up

The Dster: Seriously. I don't think your nose is crooked at all. You have wonderful cheekbones, and those glasses look good on you.

KitKat: Nice try, but I can look in a mirror too you know. You on the other hand look great. I love it when your hair is loose. Looks less severe.

He preened a little on the screen.

KitKat: Peacock! LOL

TheDster: Beautiful woman!

KitKat: Goofball!

TheDster: Sweet cheeks!

KitKat: Groan! Can we stop the mutual admiration society thing, please?

TheDster: K

KitKat: So what movie?

Chapter 3